i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
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