wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Randomize
