i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Randomize