Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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