i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Boobs speak an international language.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
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