i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize
