youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
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