I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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