I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Semen is not good for contacts.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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