Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I skipped work to stalk him.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
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