What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
