is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
