Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
