She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
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