I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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