i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
