My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I said "one day" and that day is not today
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
