is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
