Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
