just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
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