i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
