they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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