After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Yo dont text me then not text me
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
