why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
