your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
