Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize
