I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Randomize