You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
