I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Randomize
