True but thats because hes a fetus.
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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