there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
