good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Randomize