I think i peed on brittanys purse
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
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