Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
