he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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