All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
