I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Randomize
