I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
