Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Randomize
