let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
