I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
you inspire me to be a worse person
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
do nipples grow back?
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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