I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Randomize