just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Randomize
