Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
