i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
nutella sex= disaster
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
