Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
