I wish life had little blips of pornography
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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