strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
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