I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Randomize
