quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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