Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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