Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
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